To Salsa or Not to Salsa

Dearest self,

I know you’re feeling conflicted today. So much good is happening in your life that the missing pieces are becoming more obvious. You are trying so hard to be intentional, to make good choices and not demand too much certainty. That is so different for you and so of course you are feeling a little afraid of all the newness and differences right now.

There’s a Salsa class tonight and you’re not sure about going. The Magic 8 ball says go but a lot of you just wants to curl up and hide. I know some of that is going without a partner and having had one so recently–it feels a little more lonely than usual. Some of it is that you want to call I and ask him to join you–and that means intensity and heat when you’re still adjusting to that level of both from the last time you saw him. Some of it is you miss darling A so much and you’d rather just call him.

This is what leads to the endless playing of mine sweeper on the computer and getting frustrated with yourself. It’s gotten late, and the decision needs to be made. Any and all are valid. Just choose and don’t hide out on the computer.

All my love.

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